Everything's Bigger in Texas - WM25 Predictions

And once again, we come to Wrestlemania Weekend. It's amazing how far in the last few years Wrestlemania has gone from a simple PPV to an entire weekend celebration or more. It's a chance for the entire wrestling world to stop and witness something incredible, with the addition of the Hall of Fame ceremony and the Fan Axxess festival. Having gone to Axxess back before WM18 when it was in Toronto, it's a great thing and I highly recommend it for anyone who has an opportunity to go. I'm glad to see it's back in it's full glory instead of the half-assed version that they've done in the past few years. On with the predictions...

Money in the Bank Ladder Match:
Seems like of the field of eight competitors, there's only about two or three real options. My personal favorite is Christian, if for no other reason it's a chance to get him off ECW and onto one of the bigger shows. MVP's back on a winning streak, and could end up winning the match already with the U.S. title. Finlay, Mark Henry, Kane and Shelton Benjamin really don't have much of a shot at winning the match, nor does CM Punk for the simple reason that he won it last year and I can't see a repeat win. Kofi Kingston I think is going to be the big surprise in the match with the memorable spot ala Shelton's ladder walk from Wm21, but in the end smart money is on Christian or MVP. I'll go with MVP based on Vince's rumored dislike of Christian.

Winner: MVP

IC Title: JBL vs. Rey Misterio

The only real reason Bradshaw took the Intercontinental Title was to do something memorable at the show, and rumors are his retirement is imminent. He's had enough stroke to last as long as he has with the company, I see him retiring after the match as champion which has never been done before. Rey's simply in there to make sure it's a good match. Get back to the booth JBL, it's where you're at your best.

Winner: JBL

Miss Wrestlemania battle royal:

If rumored reports are to be believed, there's a total of 23 entrants confirmed for the match. The 18 current divas, plus returns of Victoria, Molly Holly (yay~!), Torrie Wilson, Jackie Gayda-Haas and Sunny (YAY~!) Candice Michelle was supposed to be in it but has a bad ankle, and apparently the rumors of Nidia returning were false, she's there just to visit friends. That leaves 3 spots undetermined, and my best guesses would be some combination of Trish Stratus, Mae Young and Santino Marella. Santino will likely be just a comedy spot, as would Mae, but you can't totally rule out the possibility of Santino actually winning the whole thing with the respect the division tends to get lately. And while a Trish win would certainly be deserving, I think Gail Kim's winning to put over her return to the company and to solidify her as a threat to Maryse and the tramp stamp title on Smackdown. Beth Phoenix could be a dark horse to win, as could Michelle McCool, but I think in the end this will be used to create a new top diva in Gail.

Winner: Gail Kim

Chris Jericho vs. Ricky Steamboat, Roddy Piper, Jimmy Snuka:

This angle was originally designed to have Jericho face Mickey Rourke at WM, but for various reasons it fell through. As a result, it does somewhat feel like a third or fourth option, but I've tried to enjoy it as much as possible. With both Ric Flair and Mickey Rourke confirmed as being at ringside, it smells of total overbooking when it comes down to it. I have a feeling that despite Ricky Steamboat being inducted into the HoF this year he'll be the first legend eliminated, after a quick first couple of minutes as he's likely in the best shape of the three. Snuka will go next, leaving Piper to be the winner after Flair gets involved and Rourke knocks Chris out cold. The sad thing is, Steamboat hasn't wrestled at all in 15 years since his retirement, and has the most intrigue as we've seen the other two trotted out several times in the last number of years. I'd personally have preferred a straight one on one match wtih Jericho, even if it was only designed to last 10 minutes or less. I'm hoping Ricky has enough left in the tank to make this one enjoyable, and gets to leave a lasting impression.

Winner: Roddy Piper (with Snuka and Steamboat)

World/WWE Tag Title Unification Match: The Colons vs. Mizorrison

The Miz and John Morrison have been the centers of the tag team scene the entire year, and richly deserve to be the ones to unify the titles. As a result, Carlito and Primo will win the match, lumberjacks or not. The angle between the teams has been a good one though and has a surprisingly decent backstory, involving the Bella Twins. Hopefully it does continue past WM, and as Miz and Morrison will probably win the belts shortly after the PPV I have a feeling it will.

Winners: The Colons

Extreme Rules: Jeff Hardy vs. Matt Hardy

This is an angle that's also felt somewhat incomplete, probably stemming from the revelation of Matt Hardy being behind the attacks on Jeff simply for the sake of swerving the fans who had fully expected Christian to be the real one behind it. Still, the brothers have done a very good job of building up what they've been allowed to do, and it has a real Bret-Owen vibe to it. I think Matt absolutely has to win the match here or the fued is dead in the water, as most of the fanbase still thinks Jeff is head and shoulders better than Matt (which is part of what the fued has been built around). Still, because it's WM and Jeff's popularity has never been higher, I think he'll go over in the end.

Winner: Jeff Hardy

World Title: Edge vs. John Cena vs. The Big Show

Of all the matches on the show, I think I care about this one the least. A big part of that is because Edge and Cena have fueded off and on for the last 3 years, and putting Big Show into the mix is not a way to freshen it up. Nor is basing the entire thing around a love triangle with Vickie Guerrero. Cena is the Hogan of the new millenium, and hasn't won at WM since 23. He's due. And the way they like to handle Edge is to make him a dangerous, opportunistic threat until he wins a title, and then completely neuter him and make him unable to hang onto said belt. I like Edge, but 8 reigns already in 3 years is a little much when none of them last more than a month or two, tops.

Winner: John Cena

All I can hope is Cena stays on Smackdown after winning.

WWE Title: Triple H vs. Randy Orton

While I may care about the previous match the least, this one's the most dissapointing. Randy Orton was absolutely on fire going into the Royal Rumble but since his win, they've managed to turn it into yet another H/McMahon overbloated storyline where Stephanie is somehow the damsel in distress. Orton by all rights deserves to win the match, but the way the storyline has gone it's inconceivable that HHH loses this one. And like Cena, HHH is due as he hasn't won a WM match since 2003, amazingly.

Winner: Triple H

Main Event: Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

As many know, I'm far from being a big Undertaker fan. But there's no denying, this match should be the main event tonight and is the one most people are looking forward to. I'll put it plainly... this is probably your match of the night, but no way is the streak ending.

Winner: Undertaker, 17-0.

Now, let's see how predictable the 24TH ANNIVERSARY of Wrestlemania is.

Rumble Young Man Rumble IV - At Last, You're Home

I can't believe I've gone eight months between postings here. I also can't believe this is the fourth year in a row I've done Royal Rumble predictions on this thing. Time flies, I guess. More of a catchup post later, but as we're seven hours and counting down to the Royal Rumble 2009 I'll move right along.

Anyone who's read this blog knows by now that the Rumble is my favorite event of the year. Even if they screw everything else up throughout the year, you can always look forward to an hour of entertainment with the Rumble match itself. Even a bad Rumble match is still usually pretty good (okay, maybe outside of 1995's thirty second intervals) and looking back years later can be entertaining (1999, I'm looking at you). On with the predictions:

Beth Phoenix vs. Melina, Women's Title:

Melina's return as a babyface has gone over spectacularly well, but as is the case with the women's division they only seem to focus on one storyline at a time and when it's over, the one who doesn't end up with the title gets shoved back down to placeholder status. Right now Beth is riding a wave of popularity, much of it due to Santino Marella, and with rumors that they want Trish Stratus back for a Wrestlemania 25 match this year, they'd be crazy not to put them together. I saw Trish's return during Christmas live, and she looked as good as ever in the couple of moments she and Beth squared off. Rumor has it they want Trish against Michelle McCool, who's the fakest diva they've ever had and is nowhere near deserving of a match with the legendary Trish. As much as I'd like to see Melina get even a short run with the title to break up the monotony, I think she's just here to feed Beth and then fall back for a Mickie James type non-push. If we can get Santino trying to do Melina's entrance again, so much the more awesome.

Jack Swagger vs. Matt Hardy, ECW Title:

The ECW title seems to switch at the most unexpected times, which is usually not welcome. But while I haven't seen a lot of Swagger he seems to be doing well in his position and a run as champion here could set him up for a bigger run later on. As for Matt, I think he firmly belongs on Raw or Smackdown and is as deserving of his brother to get a WWE title run. Matt was great for bringing visibility to the ECW title, rather than the other way around, but it's time V1 goes back to Smackdown, especially with what's rumored to be happening later this year (more on that soon). Swagger retains with some sort of cheating.

CM Punk vs. William Regal, IC Title:

I've enjoyed their series of matches over the last few weeks, and this past week's title win by Punk was one of the better tv matches in a while. They seem to be interested in pushing Punk, just not as a main eventer yet. Weird that he's already kinda had the Triple Crown (though in all fairness, the WWE title is really what makes it, not the World Title) but done it in reverse, from World to Tag to IC belt. Regal was doing well as champion, but Punk holding the belt probably leads to some newer fued options like Jericho (sigh) or someone from Legacy not named Randy Orton. Punk retains.

John Cena vs. JBL, World Title:

Well, at least he's not IN the Rumble. With the storyline ongoing with Michaels and JBL, I see it playing out one of two ways: either HBK costs Cena the title and JBL goes on to face Michaels at Mania in front of a Texas crowd, or Michaels costs JBL and they have a grudge match sans title. Either way Shawn is playing a major part in the outcome, and I learned long ago not to bet against SuperCena retaining a title.

Jeff Hardy vs. Edge, WWE Title:

Now here's where it gets good. Jeff's so not retaining the title here, which normally is a shame. But because this is almost definitely where CHRISTIAN makes his long awaited return to the WWE, I'll let it slide (also because Edge ups his title count, and the Rated R superstar is phenominal in the role of slimy champion). Edge wins the strap, thanks to Captain Charisma-ference. With any luck, 2009 will be the year that the Ring Boys trade the WWE around between the four of them (Matt, Jeff, Edge and Christian) and HHH can fued with Vickie G. all year as far as I care.

2009 Royal Rumble Match:

There's a few interesting options in the match to make it interesting, but I think Randy Orton is the odds-on-favorite to win the match. He's won me over in the last few months with his character, mainly because he really is that big of a douchebag in real life. But still, Orton is on fire and deserve the Rumble win. Outside of Orton winning, I just hope as I always do that there's one or two surprise entries in the match that are a genuine shock. Note: Jimmy Snuka and Roddy Piper DO NOT COUNT. Hey, maybe this is the the return of Braden Walker!

Sing, Sing A Song

Ripped off from Mike and Gib's blogs, click here to find out what was the #1 song on the day you were born... or just about any other specific day. As far as the day I was born, "MacArthur Park" by Donna Summer...

Yikes.

Karma is wonderful

As I post this, the San Antonio Spurs have just defeated the Phoenix Suns in the first round of the 2008 NBA Playoffs, eliminating the Suns on the same night that the Dallas Mavericks were also eliminated by New Orleans. Now I'm not usually one to believe in a higher power (IT'S ME AUSTIN! IT WAS ME ALL ALONG AUSTIN!") but to see the two teams that have bitched and complained about the Spurs for the past two years and generally thought they should have been handed the NBA Title on silver platters taken out on the same night in ROUND ONE is just too delicious. The idiotic trades for Shaq and Jason Kidd late this season make it all the sweeter, since both were done with the idea of beating San Antonio once and for all in mind.

I know I'm tempting fate by bragging like this, but quite frankly knowing that _allas and _'Antoni's team (cuz they don't play D... I've always loved that joke) are out and don't have a shot to win the championship is more than enough of a victory for me this season. I fully believe my team is more than capable of finally winning a second straight title and I'll be cheering them on the rest of the way, but I'm cheering even harder that guys like Steve Nash, Amare Stoudamire, Dirk Nowitzki, Jason Terry, Mike D'Antoni and Mark Cuban are DONE for the year, and with the doom and gloom predicted, possibly for good.

Now one for the thumb, guys. One for the thumb.

Ric Flair Tribute (Fuel - Leave The Memories Alone)

In honor of the greatest professional wrestler of all time and the fact that his storybook career has finally come to a close, here's the cool tribute video World Wrestling Entertainment has put together for, well...

The Man.

Wrestlemania the 24th

Gauntlet's been thrown down, so here's my predictions for the 24th edition of Wrestlemania, coming to you live tomorrow night from Orlando and for me by tape delay (great tickets to a Raptors game is preventing me from seeing the show live... and sadly, I'm not broken up by it at all as long as I get to watch the show later the same night).

24 Man Battle Royal/Winner faces Chavo Guerrero for the ECW Championship: There's a laundry list of guys here taking part, and I could see about five realistically winning the battle royal to face Chavo later. Kane's nearing the end of his career and despite what people seem to think these days, is deserving of a final hurrah to cap things off. Mark Henry's not abysmally bad these days and now that the Great Khali has actually been world champion, Henry by comparison doesn't seem so bad. Khali himself winning would give WWE a bit of the international press they always covet. Tommy Dreamer is the sentimental favorite as always, and if by some amazing chance they let him win the ECW Title at Wrestlemania it would be one of the most satisfying 'Mania moments ever. And my longshot here is Kofi Kingston; the company seems to have taken a shine to him and a fued with Chavo could do wonders for Kofi. All depending on who he faces, I could see Chavo keep the belt at the end of the night against almost anyone, outside of probably Khali.

BunnyMania Tag Match - Melina/Beth vs. Maria/Ashley: Aye, there's magazines to sell. As most people have been writing, this is pretty much an excuse to use the women on the roster and show them off. In the last few years the Playboy covergirl of the moment has gotten a singles match with the champion, this year's a tag match instead. For that reason I see Maria and Ashley winning, hopefully once the match is over Ashley gets put back into that wooden crate next to the Ark of the Covenant and is never heard from again. Santino hijinks are a good reason to actually watch this match, the lovely Maria is another.

Belfast Brawl: The WWE has done a remarkable job of giving us a decent blowoff for the Hornswoggle McMahon storyline, since it really looked like it'd be Vince vs. Lil' Horny himself for a while. Both JBL and Finlay are tough brawlers and can make a simple fight look like a work of art. I have high hopes for this one, but I think Finlay gets the win after Hornswoggle makes his triumphant return and interferes. Worst case scenario is they redo the Christian-Jericho-Trish finish from WMXX and it ends with Hornswoggle slapping his father and making out with Bradshaw. "Anything can happen in the WWE" is their slogan for a reason, though.

Money In The Bank: With the result only up in the air thanks to a dumbass drug suspension by Jeff Hardy, I see two real favorites here. MVP and Chris Jericho have both been spotlighted somewhat in the build to the match, and MVP is the type of star on the rise they've given the match to in the past. Part of me thinks they'll give it to Jericho all so they can justify bringing him back by giving him a decent victory at Mania (and seeing as how he hasn't won one since WM17), although if that happens I have zero belief he'll succesfully use the briefcase. Kennedy Kennedy is a bit of a longshot, they don't seem to be as behind him as they were at this point last year. Shame. Bigger shame is Matt Hardy not taking his brother's place in the match, Matt is as over as almost anybody on the roster and deserves to take part if for no other reason than to rekindle the fued with MVP.

Brand Supremacy - Umaga vs. Batista: Aka the battle of guys who had nothing else going for them. Painfully obvious this is a thrown-together match under the cheap brand battle label, but it potentially could be a good match if Batista is as irritated this year as he was last year at his WM placement. I think Batista takes the match, but the bigger problem is what to do with him afterwards. He's completely used up his main event time on Smackdown, would just look awkward to go to ECW, and would be about the 3rd or 4th string babyface on Raw after Cena, HHH and maybe Michaels. Such is life when you're involved in almost EVERY PPV World Title Match for the better part of two years.

Boxing vs. Wrestling - Floyd Mayweather vs. Big Show: The build to this has been interesting, to say the least. The initial fight at No Way Out was tremendous, but ever since people have been down on how Mayweather has acted and/or been presented. It's a shame they didn't go with the idea of Floyd being a heel and teaming with Show or MVP as initially discussed, because he's inherently dislikeable and hasn't come across all that well as the babyface in this fued. I think this one will be interesting for the sheer question of how this one will go down. I think Floyd will end up knocking Show out when all is said and done, but probably not before he gets his ass kicked quite a bit. Ultimately though, for the sake of his boxing career Mayweather has to go over here and maintain his reputation.

Flair's Last Stand - Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels: Smart money says this is Ric Flair's final match, to be retired by HBK. I think regardless of whatever stipulation this match has, there's no way Ric will stay completely retired forever. But for all intents and purposes this is probably it, and Shawn and Ric will no doubt make it one to remember. Shawn wins, but Flair goes out with a standing ovation.

Smackdown World Title Match - Edge vs. the Undertaker: This is Wrestlemania, and 15-0 won't turn into 15-1. It's a shame because Edge is simply THE heel in the business right now, but the WWE seems determined to make 2008 a do-over for Taker since his '07 title reign was cut premature by injury. I give the man props for his ring work these days, but Undertaker as champion yet again just does nothing for me.

Raw WWE Title Match - Triple H vs. Randy Orton vs. John Cena: Colour me totally uninterested with any of these three guys, but if I have to pick I'll go with HHH. Orton's been a solid heel champion since October but not exactly setting the world on fire; I enjoyed heavily Cena's sabbatical and could have used another few months break; and Hunter just feels like he's been ratcheted onto this match with a rivet gun for no real reason other than he's HHH. Trips is the most likely to walk out champion though, it's not like we haven't had eight years to get used to it though. Damn you Jeff Hardy for your suspension, winning MITB and cashing in immediately would have been the perfect capper to WM24.

On the plus side this year, I think WM has the chance to be another memorable event. None of the matches look like they'll stink up the joint and most could be pretty darn good. Add that to the sight of an outdoor show and possibly rain showers throughout the event, 24 could be a sleeper WM to remember. Don't like my picks? Check out Gib's, Mike's or Steve's for additional takes.

Rumble Young Man Rumble III - Escape From New York

Time once again for that most favored time of the year, it's Royal Rumble weekend! And as anyone who's read this blog for the past couple of years knows, it's easily my favorite PPV of the year and has been for a long time. This year's edition is going to be extremely interesting on a number of fronts. Despite the usual predictions there doesn't seem to be a clear cut favorite to win the Rumble match itself this week, and at least one of the world title matches has a certain air of mistique surrounding it.

Also helping this year's show is the fact that it's taking place at arguably the most famous arena in the world, Madison Square Garden. MSG almost always has a fun show (WM XX, Rumble 2000 , Survivor Series '96 and several Raws immediately spring to mind) and atmosphere, and this one should be no different. On with the card...

Jeff Hardy v. Randy Orton for the WWE Championship:
Hardy has been on absolute fire for the past six months or so, and in general since his return to the company in the fall of '06. The crowds absolutely bug out for the guy and treat him like a rock star, and his in-ring skills have progressed quite a bit from his spotmonkey Attitude days. Orton's carried the title fairly well since picking it up when John Cena went down to injury, and this entire fued has been booked exceedingly well since the start. Could be that it's the first title fued not to involve Cena or HHH in years, but that'll get me onto another tangent. The bottom line is this storyline has been tremendous, and I would have no qualms with it running right through to Mania. Logic and backstage rumor has Orton hanging onto the belt for HHH at 'Mania, and while I firmly believe that'll be what happens I just can't help but hope for a huge upset and Hardy coming away with the gold. Even if it's not a longterm run, the initial fallout would be huge and it would cement Jeff as a superstar forever.

Edge v. Rey Misterio for the World Championship:
Two years ago Edge's first title run came to an unsatisfying conclusion when Cena won the belt back. It took several months but Edge got another run... and promptly lost it to John Cena in a TLC match in Edge's hometown (side note: I was there and it was awesome, finish notwithstanding). Fast forward to post-WM last year and Edge pops up on Smackdown and steals yet another title, this time from Undertaker. Injury forced yet ANOTHER quick dropping of the title, but Edge came two months ago and quickly nabbed his fourth heavyweight championship. I absolutely LOVE the Rated R gimmick and most everything about Edge these days. I could do without the Vickie Guerrero thing, but picking up the Major Brothers and forming a stable with them as goons is tremendous. This current fued with Rey is just sort of there, but if nothing else the match stands to be great. And hey, it could be worse (read: Batista). Edge wins by shady means.

Ric Flair v. MVP:
It's not clear whether this match is actually for the U.S. Championship currently held by MVP (funny how they never mention who MVP beat for the title...), but the stips keep mentioning that it's a career threatening match so my guess is no. This storyline where Ric has to keep winning or he's forced to retire has been a little slipshot to say the least, and lacks consistency. I'm not saying he's got to be on every single show wrestling, but since the angle started there have been weeks where it seems like the angle is forgotten and Flair is nowhere to be found. Only to be dragged out when they have some time on the show to kill. There's no use complaining about how a Smackdown star has been getting matches primarily on Raw since the brand split is only useful when they want it to be. Bottom line, this has potential to be a great match as well, and MVP has shown himself to be one of the company's future superstars. A lot of people seem to be thinking that Flair wins here and the rubber match (MVP won back in June at Vengeance: Night Before Things Went To Hell) goes to MVP at Wrestlemania. I'd be for that _IF_ Matt Hardy isn't able to compete at WM, otherwise I'd rather see the Hardy-MVP blowoff finally happen and let Ric retire against someone else (Someone from Evolution?). But here, Flair wins and probably cheats to do so.

JBL v. Chris Jericho:
Amazingly enough, neither guy was on the roster two months ago. Jericho's return has been solid but unspectacular thanks to the booking, which is dissapointing to say the least. JBL's in-ring return was surprising, but let's face it... Bradshaw's strength has always been his mouth. I'd be in favor of him returning to the ring if it wasn't at Jericho's expense. Y2J was the hottest property in the company until the last PPV and since then he's been shuffled right back into the midcard. Which is a crime IMO, because Jericho should be one of the guys the company should spotlight with all the problems they've been having in the mainstream. As far as this match goes, I say JBL wins somehow, but the program continues to Mania where Jericho goes over. At least, I hope.

The Rumble Match:
Thus far the website lists 24 participants in the Rumble match. There might be obvious picks not included, but I'm not that observant so let's just assume there's at least one or two mystery slots available. You would THINK one of those would go to Big Show, who's the latest resigning surprise. Sure, if he doesn't win it he's just one of 30 guys... big deal. It's a huge surprise that most aren't expecting, and reinforces the "anything can happen" motto. Ron Killings might be another guy you could slot in there since he has a WWE past also, and is fresh off a TNA stint which means some national exposure (and two NWA world title wins, if you really want to scan the resume). I wouldn't put it past them to throw in a legend or two (other than Mick Foley, and god help us if it's Sgt. Slaughter) either. What's Bob Backlund doing these days?

I don't really want to predict this match, but once again I just hope for a surprise winner. It's usually pretty obvious who'll win, and this year the top candidates seem to be HHH and Undertaker, both of whom have already won Rumbles. I'm begging them to throw us a curve and have a non-obvious person win. I don't even care if they keep the title shot at WM or lose it afterwards, just stop with the repeat winners. Realistically I'll go with HHH given all that he had to do to qualify for the match, but if all were a fair world it'd be CM Punk winning and cashing in to face Edge (he DID just cost Punk the ECW Title afterall).